In 1994, just before my fifth birthday mum and dad were having problems and dad moved out. We went to dad's every second weekend. When we were at dad's he spent every moment with us and we were always happy. That year mum and dad coached my brother's basketball team. When the season finished they had a team break up and had been drinking. My brother and I went home with one of his team mates. On the way home mum crashed the car and dad went through the windscreen. He only had minor injuries but fled the scene because of warrants for his arrest for unpaid fines. Mum was arrested and dad went to see when she would be released and was arrested himself. Twenty minutes before he was due to be released he was found hanging in his cell by his singlet in an apparent attempted suicide. He went into a coma and never properly recovered. He has brain damage and still thinks it's 1994.

After that my mum and brother were never the same. I was very young and didn't understand. In the next few years drink and drugs were taken to block things out. My brother being older started his teenage years already fighting his own demons of violence and addiction. I suffered the brunt of his anger.

I was fat when I was younger and was teased by my brother and at school. I had seen him lash out with violence and was petrified. At school I did the same when the other kids teased me. By the time I was 14 I had been expelled from 8 schools in two states. I also started using drugs and alcohol heavily. At 15 I was arrested for selling drugs. By 16 I was addicted to amphetamines, cannabis and alcohol. By 17 none of my family would speak to me except to tell me to get a job and grow up. At 18 I had been to court 26 times for violence related crimes and had narrowly escaped going to jail many times. I thought I was above the law and wouldn't go to jail.

At 19 I was remanded into custody and after a month was taken to Port Phillip Prison where I was introduced to GROW. I started to relate to the people in the group, realizing I was not alone. I also realized my way of thinking was not right and that I had a lot of baggage to deal with.

Six months on I've stopped lashing out and I am taking the time to work through my feelings and although I have a lot of baggage to deal with I am young, I believe I can work through it and change my lifestyle.

K, Port Phillip Prison